Lately, life has been throwing hella lessons at me. Some I have learned from. Some I’m still wondering what the end goal is. But I’m sure I’ll figure it out someday. In like 20 years. However, there is one life lesson that I want to talk about today. I feel like it’s one that everyone will experience at least once in their life. It’s the life lesson of letting go. In a way.
There are many ways you learn to let go of things. But this time I’m going to talk about letting go of people you thought were your friends. Letting go of situations you can’t control. It’s hard, let me tell ya. There’s times where all I wanted to do was reach out to someone and ask them why they were acting the way they were. But I had to have some self-control. I had to realize that if they wanted to talk to me or see me, they would reach out to me. If they are blatantly ignoring me, then obviously they want nothing to do with me. And as bad as I wanted them to want to be my friend, I knew deep down there was nothing I could do to change their mind. So instead I’m writing a blog post on it.
When you have a situation that you just cannot change, learn to accept it and move on. It’s one of the most freeing feelings in the world. It might take some time, but coming to terms with knowing you can only control your actions, your emotions, and your words, is something we all need to learn. There is absolutely nothing you can do to control someone else. They will feel the way they feel regardless of what you do. So instead of trying to force someone to talk to you or be your friend, just move on. Accept it, realize that you have people around you who actually want to be a part of your life, and cherish them. Don’t spend time dwelling on the people you can’t have in your life and instead spend that time on the people who want to be in your life.
There are plenty of ways to let go of the ones who don’t want to be a part of your life anymore.
- Bring yourself in to the present. Don’t sit there and dwell on the past. Live in the present, appreciate what you have, and look forward to all the good there is to come.
- Focus your energy on things you can actually control. Like what you do and how you react to the situation.
- Give yourself a set amount of time to feel the negative emotions. Keeping them all inside will only make it worse in the long run. If you allow yourself a certain amount of time, like 24 hours, to feel those emotions, it’s okay. Once that time is up though, move on. You don’t want to feel negative emotions too long.
- Express your emotions creatively. Like posting a blog post about it. Or painting. Or journaling. Or whatever you do to get your emotions out.
- Remember this saying “Some of us think holding on makes us stronger; but sometimes it is letting go.”
- Replace your thoughts. When you find yourself thinking about the person who is no longer in your life, snap out of it. Take those thoughts and turn them in to something positive. Think about the good in your life instead.
- Use your strength to be thankful for the changes in life. Understand that life is always changing and have the strength to use it to your advantage. Sometimes we fear change but change can truly be a wonderful thing. It can turn out to be a blessing in disguise.
- Realize you have the choice to let it go. Tell yourself you’re letting go and moving on. Doing this will help you realize you have a choice in the matter and you can choose to make yourself happy by letting go.
These are just a few tips that I have found on letting go. But like just do it. My wise mother always told me to forget it and move on. There’s nothing you can do about it so just get over it. And that’s what I’m basically telling you. Just let it the f*** go.
I’m sorry you had to go through this, but this life lesson is so important – not only for people!
Letting go of things I can’t control is so hard for me. I never stop worrying about “what if’s”… I really like your tip about letting yourself feel those emotions for a fixed time, then letting them go consciously!